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Jediguy

Sr Member
RPF PREMIUM MEMBER
A prisoner in jail receives a letter from his wife: "Dear Husband, I have decided to plant some lettuce in the back garden. When is the best time to plant them?" The prisoner, knowing that the prison guards read all mail, replied in a letter: "Dear Wife, whatever you do, do not touch the back garden. That is where I hid all the money." A week or so later, he received another letter from his wife: "Dear Husband, You wouldn't believe what happened, some men came with shovels to the house, and dug up all the back garden." The prisoner wrote another letter back: "Dear wife, now is the best time to plant the lettuce."
 

Jediguy

Sr Member
RPF PREMIUM MEMBER

I wish the book "How to be an adult" came in hard cover...​

.. it would be that much more effective at bonking stupid people in the head.
 

Jediguy

Sr Member
RPF PREMIUM MEMBER
Scene: With a patient in my medical exam room Me: How old are your kids? Patient: Forty-four and 39 from my wife who passed away, and from my second wife, 15 and 13. Me: That’s quite the age difference! Patient: Well, the older ones didn’t give me any grandkids, so I made my own. —Mria Murillo
 

Jediguy

Sr Member
RPF PREMIUM MEMBER
Here's a beautiful Alien EVA helmet we recently printed for a client. He graciously took these photos and allowed us to share them.


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Jediguy

Sr Member
RPF PREMIUM MEMBER
Customer: What’s the Wi-Fi password?

Bartender: You need to buy a drink first.

Customer: OK, I’ll have a Coke.

Bartender: Three dollars.

Customer: There you go. So what’s the Wi‑Fi password?

Bartender: “You need to buy a drink first.” No spaces, all lowercase.
 

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