Worst "edited for TV' movies

[Treadwell]

Did they even bother making TV versions of Kill Bill?

 

[Mola Rob]

John Carpenter's The Thing
The Road Warrior
Cyborg

The TV edits are so bad they're funny. Absolutely terrible narration added to The Thing introducing the characters. The Road Warrior gets a new badly written narration by some dude with an American accent. Cyborg is mangled so badly it's almost impossible to follow the story.

 

[Kennyd]

Not a movie, but the wonderful mini series GBH was on one of the satellite channels recently. Not only was it cut to ribbons for time, they actually CHANGED THE PLOT!!! :wacko

I could hardly believe it.

 

[Nexus6]

Blazing Saddles, although it did add deleted scenes that were funny.

The Big Lebowski

"This is what happens when you find a stranger in the Alps!"

Pulp Fiction.

Why even try?

I think ^THESE^ are my number one picks. The censors hatchet them so hard, they're almost POINTLESS to watch.

'Resident Evil: Apocalypse' is another one that makes me chuckle. Every time a character says: "M-----F-----", they substitute the word: "Motivator", & it makes it ridiculous.

Another one is "Leon" ("The Professional"). I almost shot Dr. Pepper out my nose the first time I heard Stansfield scream: "I HAVEN'T GOT TIIIIIIME - - - FOR THIS MICKEY MOUSE BULL-SQUASH!!!"

 

[aeonpulse]

"I HAVEN'T GOT TIIIIIIME - - - FOR THIS MICKEY MOUSE BULL-SQUASH!!!"

Hahahahahahah, I gotta find a YouTube clip of that.

 

[Kerr Avon]

Blazing Saddles, although it did add deleted scenes that were funny.

The bean eating scene is silent. WHY???????? :cry

 

[GeneralFROSTY]

Anytime "My Cousin Vinny" airs on TV, it's pretty much useless to watch. They have to cut out so much cussing (which is were a lot of the comedy comes from).

 

[Flagg]

Way back the USA network played "Heavy Metal." They didn't bleep anything or replace anything. they just cut out all the swears and nudity and even some of the gore. The movie was about an hour long and played like a fever dream. If you had not seen it before you barely would of been able to tell what was going on.

 

[Wes R]

Spaceballs, Blazing Saddles for sure, Robocop. I remember when I was in highschool a station actually got to play Spaceballs unedited. It shocked me given that it wasn't a cable station but a local place out of Cleveland. I've seen so many badly edited ones and half the time it isn't even for content but they do a hack job just to make it fit the time slot.

 

[Werstrooper]

A guy I worked with had one of those dads that would edit the crap out of films for the kids.

They had a copy of Terminator 2 taped from the TV and also edited even more by their dad :lol

I think he said it went for about an hour and 20 mins

 

[binkleywalker]

Weird Science.

Chet tells the hot chick, 'But first, I'd like to better know you, muffin.'

The original, 'I'd like to butter your muffin.'

Almost the same thing.

Brian

 

[Bizarro Lois]

Did they even bother making TV versions of Kill Bill?

I was just about to post this one. "Party Wagon"

The bean eating scene is silent. WHY???????? :cry

Haven't you ever heard of an SBD?:lol

Also, Showgirls. I will watch the edited version just for the bikinis drawn on the the girls.

 

[terryr]

The Blues Brothers. Dubbed by Jim Belushi trying to sound like John.

I guess John died before he did a version.

 

[darthgordon]

Mallrats - Jason Mewes may have two lines that aren't completely dubbed over by someone who sounds nothing like him.

I caught Jay and Silent Bob Strike Back one day on network televsion. If I hadn't seen the movie already, I wouldn't know what was going on. The only one who's lines weren't cut out was the monkey's... and he didn't even speak.

 

[JoeG]

Not a movie, but the A&E version of The Sopranos are just so god awful to watch. They just drop out the audio when someone curses, so sometimes you hear like 2 words out of a whole sentence.

 

[Werstrooper]

And maybe silent bob

 

[terryr]

Rambo 4 also has the F-bombs silenced. And the subtitled ones blanked off. When Rambo says 'F*&@ the World' they drop the level down really low instead, which is okay because Stallone mutters anyway.

 

[Dart]

I hate watching movies on TV because of this crap. I remember watching Airplane as a kid and then seeing it as an adult. Lots of stuff cut outta that one. There's only 2 or 3 channels I trust not to edit out all the good stuff. I mean, what's a movie without the trifecta of violence, coarse language and nudity?

 

[cocomonk22]

It seems recently that TV versions are less edited than they used to be due to lessening content restrictions. I wish the ones with almost all swearing replaced with dubbed lines were still around so I could edit it as a secondary soundtrack for the movie.

 

[Wes R]

Back in the 90s A&E would show unedited movies. There were several British ones, late at night, that would have partial nudity. They'd have a warning about it but there it was. My english teacher in 7th or 8th grade actually showed us the version of Romeo and Juliet with Michael York unedited. He jokingly warned us ahead of time, now some kid would turn him in over it and he'd have gotten fire.