Movie Cliches that need to be Retired.

[Rotwang]

The hero has a teenage son/daughter/ward/sidekick who can infiltrate the most tightly secured installation without any tools or special training and escape every possible security measure imaginable. But they will be captured the second they have discovered something important so the hero has to rescue them.

Formations are only for show in ancient and medieval battles. As soon as the armies start to fight it's every man for himself and everybody is duelling one-on-one with an enemy soldier, except for the hero who is cutting a swathe of destruction and picking out those unlucky few enemy warriors who couldn't find a partner to fight against. Everybody is evenly scattered over the entire battlefield while fighting. Nobody is hanging back or trying to stick together and fight as a unit. Cavalry charges end with cavalry in the middle of the enemy, they never pull back and charge again or make any use of the speed of their horses to their advantage. Troops in hand to hand combat can fight almost indefinitely and exhaustion does not exist.

 

[Solo4114]

Boy is that ever true. To the extent formations are used at all, for that matter. Usually it's just "This line of guys go run at that line of guys, then crash into each other, after which...dueling! And this time, I don't want ANYONE interfering in any duel, alright? You see two guys fighting, you leave them ALONE. Let them do their thing. Whatever you do, do NOT help anyone on your side...except for dramatic purpose."

 

[Ramiel]

Probably it has been posted before, but...

The scary sound you hear in the darkness or behind something it's always a CAT that will jump out and "hiss" loudly, and never the bad guy/psycho killer (that usually is right behind the character that is going to die after the "cat scene"...)

 

[Mercury]

Read my mind. I hate the modern family sitcom.

In my opinion the two exceptions to that are "Grounded for Life" and "Still Standing". The wives are hot but just as bad as the husbands. They have the two best sitcom wives as far as I'm concerned. Hot, funny, and so easy to relate to.:cool

 

[Scapey]

Orange and Blue.
It's getting oooooooold.

 

[NoTsOsErIoUs]

Why is it everytime someone shuts a mirror-fronted bathroom wall cabinet the monster or villan is standing behind them, where they weren't there in the previous shot . Is was great in American Werewolf in London but it's been done to death now.

 

[Krel]

For that matter, doesn't cocking an automatic pistol with a live round in the chamber cause the slide to lock back, at least on some pistols?

The slide locks back only if the magazine is empty. It lets you know that you are out of ammunition, and aids in reloading.

I think this practice originates with flintlock pistols and percussion revolvers. With a flintlock, moving from half-****** to fully ****** means business. Same thing with a single-action revolver. With a double-action one, it's SLIGHTLY less menacing. But with automatics, jacking the slide back...what's that serve to do? ESPECIALLY when you aren't loading a fresh magazine AND have just been in a big firefight??!

It originates with the single action revolver. It was safer to carry the weapon with an empty chamber because there was no firing pin safety. With early auto loaders it was safer to carry the weapon with a loaded magazine, but with the chamber empty for the same reason. If you had a round in the chamber, and the hammer down, an accidental blow to the hammer could fire the round.

David.

 

[p51]

When someone has ****** a semi-auto handgun and then points it, it automatically makes another cocking sound. Real handguns don’t rattle like that unless they’re totally worn out or some part wasn’t installed correctly.

 

[Solo4114]

The slide locks back only if the magazine is empty. It lets you know that you are out of ammunition, and aids in reloading.



It originates with the single action revolver. It was safer to carry the weapon with an empty chamber because there was no firing pin safety. With early auto loaders it was safer to carry the weapon with a loaded magazine, but with the chamber empty for the same reason. If you had a round in the chamber, and the hammer down, an accidental blow to the hammer could fire the round.

David.

Yeah but that's not what I'm talking about. I get that you have to chamber a live roundbin real life. I'm talking about when they presumably already have a live round chambered ajd then cock the hammer or rack the slide or whatever.

When someone has ****** a semi-auto handgun and then points it, it automatically makes another cocking sound. Real handguns don’t rattle like that unless they’re totally worn out or some part wasn’t installed correctly.

Ooh forgot that one. Good catch!

 

[binkleywalker]

1. Anytime a tape recorder or video is fast forwarded or rewound it makes that screaching sound. Never heard that in real life

2. Anytime skin is ripped off or a body cavity is being rooted around in, it makes this way too loud, way too squishy sound. There was some movie where the evil gypsy lady would take out her teeth and the sound it made was louder than any explosion in any movie ever. It just sounds too fake and takes you right out of the scene. Way too exagerated.

 

[Rotwang]

No matter what historical period and geographic area the film is alleged to portray, the main characters act and talk like early 21st century Americans, preferably tossing in some ethnic stereotypes.

In ancient times there were three haircuts. The short Roman cut, completely shaven (usually reserved for the bad guy) or dreadlocks.

There are no skilled tailors or weavers in post apocalyptic settings. Everybody wears ragged clothing made from postage-stamp scraps, held together with twine and big irregular stitches. All existing stocks of clothing just vanish overnight.

Anybody who speaks British English is either a butler, a Roman or a criminal mastermind.

All British people either speak "Dick van **** Cockney" or flawless RP.

The moment you step into a former East Bloc country the weather is cold and grey with snow on the ground 3/4th of the year. Russia is snowed under 365 days a year.

All alien planets have a single climate, a single culture and a unified planetary government.

Damaged electrical devices don't fry or shut down, they remain live, continually oozing sparks, creating a major hazard.

A mask will not only change your face, but change your eye colour, alter your voice and even change your height and body shape. Even the most complex disquise can be applied in 30 seconds unless there is an emergency where it takes forever.

No matter what happens to a character in an SF series (aging, dramatic physical transformation, cybernetic implants) they can always be turned back to their original form without any lasting effects.

All military camps have a signpost giving the exact distance to Poughkeepsie, Okahumpka and Dogpatch up to a 1/4th of a mile.

 

[YenChih Lin]

1. Anytime a tape recorder or video is fast forwarded or rewound it makes that screaching sound. Never heard that in real life

2. Anytime skin is ripped off or a body cavity is being rooted around in, it makes this way too loud, way too squishy sound. There was some movie where the evil gypsy lady would take out her teeth and the sound it made was louder than any explosion in any movie ever. It just sounds too fake and takes you right out of the scene. Way too exagerated.

Hey! Now that you mention it... - ewww, squishy sound! ewwwww! lol

 

[Too Much Garlic]

Another thing that should be abolished is the expected reaction. Someone is killed and the friend/whatever lets out this long NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO. No one in real life does that. A really emotional outburst of the "NOOO" type is Christopher Reeve in Superman The Movie.

Also... and this may be due to the actors/actresses not really being all that good, but you hear their reaction, but you don't really feel it. They are just reciting it... this happens and then I scream or push something off a table in anger or bang my hands against the wall... with an emphasis on a particular action, rather than showing the emotion. You just know that they are going to do exactly that action when particular events happen. It's a mindless action rather than an emotional reaction.

And a pet peeve - pointless characters.

 

[p51]

Here’s a BIG one that has always bugged me:
· At a military funeral, everyone jumps when they fire the 21 gun salute.

What a crock. In real life, those rifles are never that close, everyone know it’s coming and hardly anyone flinches.

 

[Solo4114]

But just look at the grief on the recent widow's face!

Suzanne: "I always knew this could happen, but you SWORE to me you'd bring Jim home safe! Damn you, Cody!" >slap< [walks off]

Cody: [To Gen. Blaine] "General...I'm gonna get the bastards who did this...with or without the brass' approval."

Blaine: [probably played by Lance Henriksen] "We just received word that Petrokov was located in a training camp outside of Tblisi two days ago. Your mission is a go, major. Terminate...with extreme prejudice."

 

[Stantz92]

one movie cliche is that the male hero's name is John or Jack

My name is Jack/John. I dont see that as a problem.
http://www.therpf.com/images/styles/smilies/dry.gif

 

[Robert412]

With any blurry digital photo you can zoom in and render a crisp HD quality image of the person you are trying to catch.

Usually, simply by clicking or saying 'enhance.'

 

[Robert412]

Here’s a BIG one that has always bugged me:
· At a military funeral, everyone jumps when they fire the 21 gun salute.

What a crock. In real life, those rifles are never that close, everyone know it’s coming and hardly anyone flinches.

I've been to two military funerals. They were that close. I did jump... For the first shot... Both times.

 

[Solo4114]

Here's one. (Might've been covered way earlier, but still.)


Young professionals or city government employees (cops, district attorneys, etc.) in what are likely low paying jobs, who happen to live in spacious, fabulously appointed apartments in major metropolitan areas.

No, "Rent control" is not a suitable excuse.

 

[Jet Beetle]

Here's one. (Might've been covered way earlier, but still.)


Young professionals or city government employees (cops, district attorneys, etc.) in what are likely low paying jobs, who happen to live in spacious, fabulously appointed apartments in major metropolitan areas.

No, "Rent control" is not a suitable excuse.

Oh, man that has always bugged me too. Lois Lane's apartment in Superman the movie. The one that really topped it all off was in the 80's a movie came out called Stone Cold or something like that, starring the football player inboy at the time and he was supposed to be playing a cop - when they showed his place it was an enormous artist loft with neon and a coke machine and if that wasn't enough- he had a kimono dragon as a pet.