Since when is leaving an abusive relationship a weak thing? If you ask me, having Marla staying with Khan is just another example of more chauvanistic writing in TOS since back then it was expected of a woman to stand by her man through good and bad, thick and thin, and even if your man abuses you physically &/or mentally.
Quoted
For
Truth.
Jeyl- You cannot under any and all circumstances defend the relationship between Khan and Marla. Zero tolerance. He abused her. Period.
She may have stood beside him, however this was the
wrong thing to do. He was completely toxic for her as EVERY abuser in EVERY abusive relationship ALWAYS is.
This is the evil nature of the abusive relationship. Go and look up the "cycle of violence."
It starts with treating a person as an object. Verbal/physical abuse. Complete control over another person through the fear of violence, or the "threat" of ending the relationship (something Khan did right away knowing that Marla would not "leave" when he demanded her to).
The uglyness is that the abuser KNOWS they have control over the abused. They might shower them with love, until they go against their wishes (or the smallest thing sets them off). This results in mental or physical abuse. Then the "I'm sorry, forgive me" phase and the "things are wonderful again" phase... and the cycle begins again.
Except that each time, the abuse becomes worse/more intense. As mentioned eventually resulting in a brutal beating that leaves the victim in the hospital or dead. It is not a question of it happening or not, but a question of time.
The insidious nature of the relationship is that the victim is lead to believe that in some way the abuser's behaviour is the victim's fault. That "they" are responsible for the abuser's actions, and so by forgiving them, they are in some way forgiving themselves for upsetting the abuser. They may also come to believe the garbage that the abuser may spout in that they are not "good enough" for any other person and so the abuser is "all they've got." In other words the threat is that if they leave, they will never find someone else ever again as they are too stupid, ugly, fat, or unacceptable for anyone else to want to be with them.
There is also the delusional hope that "things will get better", and each session of violence will be "the last time it happens."
This is just another method of control. Some of which Khan displayed in the very brief meetings between Marla and himself.
These should have set off all kinds of red flags to Marla, but she was too enamoured with him to see them, too naive to recognize them, or outright chose to ignore them. She should have left immediately. It does not make her a "strong female" to have stuck beside him, it makes her a victim who despite it being ABSOLUTELY THE WRONG THING TO DO, still chooses to "stand by her man."
You cannot defend this. You cannot twist her inability to leave Khan as being inner strength. Nor should you
ever paint the relationship between Khan and Marla in a positive light. There are no positives. You are dead wrong here.
I completely agree that this is (bad) 60s chauvanistic writing that is along the same lines as the reason behind Vina not wanting to return to Earth... only a thousand times worse.
Kevin
