"They had to replace my metal plate with a plastic one. Every time Catherine revved up the microwave, I'd **** my pants and forget who I was for about half an hour or so"
"We were going to call. But, Eddie wanted to make it a surprise."
Eddie: "Yeah, you surprised?"
Clark: "Surprised Eddie? If I woke up tomorrow with my head sewn to the carpet, I wouldn't be more surprised than I am right now."
Ellen: Oh Aunt Bethany, you shouldn't have done that.
Aunt Bethany: Oh dear, did I break wind?
Uncle Lewis: ***** did the room clear out, Bethany? Hell no, she means presents. You shouldn't have brought presents.